Q: So Nigel and Mike, How do you see us fairing this coming season
N: Terrible
M: Personally I wish we hadn't been promoted, we could be playing Stoke, Villa and Derby and probably struggle
Q: Can you elaborate
N: What does that mean, If it's what I think, it's none of your business. Sell Fonte
M: Same as him, but much worser.
Q: So what do you think are our weaknesses
N: The players, the management, the ground, the supporters, the owner, hard seats, tippy-tappyness, the pies
M: Not enough hoof ball, bring in Mark Fotheringham to shore up the midfield
Q: Strengths:
N: Fredericks can run fast
M: We sold him, idiiot
N: Who to
M: I dunno, don't call me an idiot.
N: I didn't, you called me an idiot
Q: What do you think of the recruitment policy
N: I never watch television, but the wife likes anything to do with dwarfs, wedding dresses, buying rubbish and re-painting it
and flipping houses
M: So does mine, except things are different these days
N: This burger is awful
M: You haven't tasted it yet
N: That's why
Q: Back to football, can you name some teams we really should beat.
N: I can't think of one, except Huddersfield and QPR
M: I dunno Nige, QPR will be difficult
Q: What do you think of the Kline situation.
N: I told you, I never watch television
M: Yes you do, we watched Rag, Tag and Bobtail on Dave the other day, you remember a couple of weeks ago, we were playing
at Wembley and didn't think it worth bothering.
N: I don't remember that, what was it about
Q: What do you think of Ryan Sessegnon, should we sell him.
N: Who, oh yea that young kid, he should score more goals like his brother
M: I like him, he has nice legs and a a cute bottom
N: You're thinking of that geezer down the pub
M: Which pub
N: The one in Shepherds Bush
M: I've never been there
N: You have, The South Africa Legs
Q: Are you both season ticket holders
N: Nige is
M: You're Nige
N: No I'm not
Q: What a season ticket holder or Nige
M: Who are you talking to
Q: I'm not sure
Q: Who was your favorite player last season
N: It has to be Chris Martin
M: Nah, Aluko
N: We sold him
Q: Thank you both, this is me, Anne Brisquit, it's the first time I've interviewed people in Wormwood Scrubs
That is great. U shud defo should come down to kingston (meet u in da Nandos) for bants and that. Every1 down centz mag prob elan hector weso!