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In seven days I shall become a multi-millionaire

Started by CorkedHat, March 14, 2010, 10:14:19 AM

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CorkedHat

I am a fortunate person. Within a few days I shall become a multi-millionaire.
In the past seven says I have been advised that I have won first prize in a Spanish Lottery even though amazingly I never bought a ticket; a nice man in Lagos wishes to bestow on me $500,000 because someone he knows died in an air crash and has nobody with whom he can bequeath his legacy; today a gentleman from France wrote to me in French (it wasn't you was it Silver Fox?) to explain that he has an inoperable brain tumour and that death is imminent. Before this ultimate catastrophe occurs he tells me that he access to a million euros which for some   convoluted reason he needs my banking details in order that he can facilitate the transaction, providing me with half that sum for my cooperation; a company in Hong Kong wishes to appoint me as distributor of their products in Australia and if I provide them with details of my bank account they will lodge $500,000 immediately so that I can get this lucrative business up and running.
They all trust that my family are well and that one day they hope to meet me in person.
Gee I am a lucky person, but honestly I do not deserve such fortune.
If any of you feel as though you are indeed worthy of receiving a few million euros please provide me with your bank details and I shall pass them on – honest.
What we do for others will live on. What we do for ourselves will die with us

Lighthouse

What great fortune you have. Would you believe it? Well yes I would. I have had a number of Phone Calls telling me that My Mum, who died less than six months ago,had entered the Australian lottery and won. She also entered the Competition to win a car and the one to win a necklace worth millions and, now I can hardly hold in my joy, A TRIP AROUND THE WORLD.

Now when informed of the awful news of My Mums passing, these lovely people say, if I pay a small fee, anything from 2 quid to 80 pounds depending on which chap is talking, I CAN HAVE THE PRIZE. When told I don't want it or don't believe them. They seem to become angry and then threaten to give the prize to the latest disaster fund. For some reason they become irate when I say that would be fine.

Still they keep on ringing and writing. Less and less as time goes on.But I really would like to meet them face to face and show them how grateful I am.
The above IS NOT A LEGAL DOCUMENT. It is an opinion.

We may yet hear the horse talk.

I can stand my own despair but not others hope

epsomraver

Remember me corkie your old mate when the cheque arrives, you remember me, always there for you , shoulder to cry on, sub when you needed one, You don't remember me ? I am hurt!!


tjl

I can beat that, i can have a much bigger organ than i now have plus win all the European lottos and a new bride from Russia Mrs tjl says go for it, i can't work out how the knew i played the organ, the wonders of the internet.

Logicalman

Quote from: tjl on March 14, 2010, 11:24:48 AM
I can beat that, i can have a much bigger organ than i now have plus win all the European lottos and a new bride from Russia Mrs tjl says go for it, i can't work out how the knew i played the organ, the wonders of the internet.

I was thinking the same thing though, but how much cream to put on? It seems a very small tube for all that wood, just to make the organ grow larger. I have to consider the neighbors as well, what would they if I suddenly had a larger organ? SWMBO seems quite happy with the one I've got already, and she even plays with it a few times herself, singing Hymns to the almighty, at the top of her voice.

HatterDon

Quote from: tjl on March 14, 2010, 11:24:48 AM
I can beat that, i can have a much bigger organ than i now have plus win all the European lottos and a new bride from Russia Mrs tjl says go for it, i can't work out how the knew i played the organ, the wonders of the internet.

pull out all the stops, mate!
"As long as there is light, I will sing." -- Juana, la Cubana

www.facebook/dphvocalease
www.facebook/sellersandhymel


Burt

I am looking forward to Mr RidgeRider informing us that he has won a year's supply of butt butter...

HatterDon

I'm looking forward to discovering how much butt butter constitutes a year's supply for RR.  :002:


:023:

or, perhaps, not so much  :029: :58:
"As long as there is light, I will sing." -- Juana, la Cubana

www.facebook/dphvocalease
www.facebook/sellersandhymel

leonffc

Does that mean you are going to stop harping on about that pint I owe you?


Tom

Fulham for life!

FC Silver Fox

.......... today a gentleman from France wrote to me in French (it wasn't youwas it Silver Fox?) to explain that he has an inoperable brain tumour and that death is imminent.... (sic)

Non, ce n'était pas moi, Monsieur Chapeau Bouchonné (Corked Hat in French), at least I hope not.

Anyway, you are already a multi-millionaire in how much you are loved and admired by friends the world over. Don't count your money, count how much you are missed by your friends when you are absent.  The Battersea boy is rolling in it.


Finn and Corked Hat, you are forever part of the family.