Sent to me by a Chelsea-supporting mate............

[dgnffc]

1) Well, that's the last time any of the Chelsea lads joke about the size of Ashley Cole's weapon.

2) Apparently Ashley Cole was so shocked at shooting that kid, he then crashed his car into him

3) What was the first thing heard in the Chelsea dressing room after the shooting? "No, Ashley... that's not how you play Call Of Duty".

4) What's the difference between Ashley Cole & Raoul Moat? One of them went on a shooting rampage after his Geordie wife left him,......the other was Raoul Moat

5) You know what they say. Once a Gunner, always a Gunner.

6) The weird thing was that though the work experience kid got shot, it was Didier Drogba that fell to the floor in agony.

7) Let's face it, it's not the first time Ashley has been accused of a negligent discharge.

8)  What are the three scariest words Carlo Ancelotti can use at Chelsea? "Extra shooting practice".

9) There's some good news for Ashley - he's now qualified to be vice-president of the USA.

10) Mind you, it's not all bad for work experience kid and Chelsea fan Tom Cowan either. He had Ashley in his fantasy league team, so he's picked up +2 points for a shot on target.

Was this his first shot on target this season, by the way?