My sons first drunken puking session has started.

[michaelread]

Actually i've had my biggest moral delima  tonight. My son asked for a few quid to take the bird to the pictures (Saw 4 for fecks sake), though i'm skint i said yeah no problem, i want him to do well obviously. Anyhow a bit later before she turns up he asks if she can sleep the night as she's had a row with the parents . Without thinking i say no proplem. I pop down the shops and when i come back my son Zak is on the balcony with what turns out to be the mum (and to be pc about it, a bloke very obviously not the girls dad). They say the girl has runaway (does it every week apparantley) I say well she's meant to be staying the night do you want me to ring you when she get's here? Obviously they say yeah, but i ask if she says she'll run off if i tell you you shall i still call? They say yeah, we've called the police and we call them every week. The girl turns up and i say i'm  not being funny but if my daughter was missing i'd go berserk can i ring your mum? she says no and if i do she'll sleep in the streets. Long story short she's staying the night, but i feel terrible about it. But i believe her when she says she'll stay out if i ring the parents. I've tried to ask her can i say i wont say where you staying , but i know you'll safe, she started shaking and said NO . What would you do?

Without being rude, and with being a 20 year old who sees this with my mates, I'd be giving a strong word to your son about perhaps getting out of it now if he isn't too attached.

This is in no way meant to be a personal attack so please dont take it that way, it is just that this same scenario happens to one of my best friends and has been happening since he was 15 with the same girl, he's had himself bashed by the girls dad, copped an overnight lockup over covering for her arse holding a bag of weed on his person when she got pulled over, and not to mention, losing his job because he constantly turned up late because he'd been taking care of her poo with her parents.

It was all because the girl was the problem, and the parents werent the best people but they didnt have the best daughter either. It could be a big time bomb and screw up his perception of dating and the quality of girls you can find if you dont settle for anything.

[finnster01]

Actually i've had my biggest moral delima  tonight. My son asked for a few quid to take the bird to the pictures (Saw 4 for fecks sake), though i'm skint i said yeah no problem, i want him to do well obviously. Anyhow a bit later before she turns up he asks if she can sleep the night as she's had a row with the parents . Without thinking i say no proplem. I pop down the shops and when i come back my son Zak is on the balcony with what turns out to be the mum (and to be pc about it, a bloke very obviously not the girls dad). They say the girl has runaway (does it every week apparantley) I say well she's meant to be staying the night do you want me to ring you when she get's here? Obviously they say yeah, but i ask if she says she'll run off if i tell you you shall i still call? They say yeah, we've called the police and we call them every week. The girl turns up and i say i'm  not being funny but if my daughter was missing i'd go berserk can i ring your mum? she says no and if i do she'll sleep in the streets. Long story short she's staying the night, but i feel terrible about it. But i believe her when she says she'll stay out if i ring the parents. I've tried to ask her can i say i wont say where you staying , but i know you'll safe, she started shaking and said NO . What would you do?

Well, lets look at it a bit analytically. She runs away every week. That means she'll show up at your house every week. At some point the coppers will show up too (assuming she is young, do not know the ages here). I agree with Mr Michael that the girl is the problem and sooner or later the crap is going to land on your plate (your son's, but that is your plate at the end of the day). You don't want her to sleep in the street. Obviously she comes from a broken home (she is not my daughter by any chance mate...?), and she doesn't want to stay "home". So she jumps on any boyfriend instead. From what I read, this must have been going on for a while, but this is the first time she shows up on your doorstep. Problem is, your son may think "he is the only one" etc. , get attached, and then you are stuck with a lovesick teenager.

You need to have a quiet word with Zak. And then you need to try find him a new girlfriend and this problem will go away (the root of the problem may not, I feel sorry for the girl, but then at least it won't be your problem anymore). You keep letting her stay, this poo will go on for ever. Man up, talk to your son and tell him this poo has to stop and tell him she will not be staying anymore because you can do without the parent/cop admin every weekend and that's the final word. Just ask him  :tom: would he do if he was in your shoes? He's probably old enough to understand the logic. "Plenty of fish in the sea you know" speach time.