Unfortunately there is an ugly duckling in my family, my old man is a Utd fan. He has always been one since the early 70s, he turns 50 next week and they say life starts at 50 so I want him to stop being a closet Fulham fan and finally admit he is one of us.
In the early 80s my mum introduced him to Fulham and he would go home and away. He was there in the famous sickening Derby controversy. He was there when we were promoted the season before under Mcdonald. He claims O'Driscoll is one of his favourite players ever. He was there when we beat Juventus and in Hamburg for the final. He wears a Fulham wooly hat to work in the winter. He always wants Fulham to win when they play Utd. He even refers to Fulham as "we" or "us" when discussing things Fulham related.
My Dad is always there for me and is a great generous Dad/Grandad who my kids adore. But until he confesses there's nothing that matters more than Fulham I'm afraid to say he's a numpty.
And as a milkman we shall refer to him as Ernie until he sees sense. So please below do your utmost to convince Ernie why he should admit what I already know.
And please refer to him as Ernie. We're having a bbq later so I will take great pleasure in showing Ernie your responses
Some may say this is disrespectful to your parents. But you earn respect and wearing that glory hunting shirt is not one of them
COYW and Come on Ernie, you know it makes sense.
049:gifC'mon earnie you must be a Londoner so it's a no brainer 049:gif
Surely being a Londoner qualifies him to be an outright ManUre fan !Anyway you can always remind him that in this age of tolerance being outed as a Whites fan is no shame, and that you'll still love and support him. On a more serious note, being Fulham is to be part of an extended family. Supporting a top 5 just makes you supporter number 126,500,17 on their corporate books.
Look Ernie You support the team you regularly see play. I don't mean on the telly I mean go out of your way to watch play. The team that breaks your heart to lose. So come on you can admire Man United but for heavens sake they are 200 miles up the motorway and you will never be able to regularly attend their games. The Man U fans do not consider you one of them so join the Fulham family full time.
Ernie, just reading the description of you by your son you are a Fulham fan, so declare it and be proud. Also remind him that you will be in charge of picking his care home.
I lived up in Manchester during the great days of United. European Cup winners in 68. Best, Law , Charlton etc. I was a fan and when I could went to Old Trafford. But my Dad was a Fulham fan and beat me so I ended up supporting Fulham.
But the big difference is that if you are a United Fan. Life is one continuing disappointment. Another failed Championship bid. Another failed Cup run. Whereas a Fulham supporter we think life is wonderful with a home win against Barrow. So for peace and harmony and love of life. Being a Fulham fan will always trump being a Manchester United Fan.
You support the club you follow, home and away through thick and thin. The best analogy for Earnie, is that Fulham are his parents, he cares about them, loves them, worries when things aren't so great and is full of joy when the are. Manure are a favourite uncle, you like him and when you see him it's great. But he's an uncle not the parents you cherish.
I have the same problem with my wife - also a red although she is questioning her choice now that moron is the manager
Its a no brainer got to be Fulham plus the fact I no Two Ton Ted from Teddington hes got a bakers van .
ERNIE!! You are living in denial. Get as grip.!
Think of the children.
Ask yourself, if we win, do you not smile? If we lose, do you not cry?
Also, everyone knows that Wayne Rooney looks like a potato! All Fulham players look like Gods!
Besides Dannyboi is a bloody good chap!!
Drape a black and white scarf with the FFC crest on each end around his neck. Stand him in front of a large mirror. You and your daughter stand either side of him. Job done. Bring hankie.
Ernie, as of this season, Man U is the Chelsea of the north. You know it, I know it, everyone knows it. It just isn't spoken of.
COYW!
Ernie has read all your responses and took it in good spirits. Deep down I know he's one of us and he sort of admitted it today.
I know he will be checking out fof later tonight for more responses, he loves all this attention. He's a bit sad like that lol. Only joking Dad!
By the way he's called Dave and is a proper Dave, so not sure if Ernie is better or worse hahaha.
not sure if this helps, but my dad is a man u fan and made me one until I was about 15, I kind of got sick if them didn't support anyone until alfyad bought Fulham and have never looked back through the good times and the bad, at the end if the day Fulham is a football club man u is corporate mega club supporting them to me is a kind to supporting Nike or Mercedes. football support for me is about the ups and the downs, winning is not everything and that's why he should support Fulham, we are a family is not always great but we get through it together COYW!!!
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I can't seem to offer any creative advice to Dav and Ernie about switching from ManU to Fulham, other than it's just the decent thing to do for the family's sake.
Well, maybe it's just too easy to support a big team. Following an underdog like Fulham leads to more interesting insight into the depths of your character.
Nogood "families should stick together, see" Boyo
ManU = glitter, superficial, image, wealth, corporate, costs a fortune to see a game.
Fulham= community, family values, history, taking care of our own, reasonable admission prices.
For the sake of everything holy, Ernie, listen to your son. Don't throw it all away on a fling with a gaudy floozy, but embrace your true love, who has true, deep beauty, and doesn't need loads of make-up or bling, because they have something deep, profound, human.
Do you want to be named after a Bennie Hill song Ernie? Someone who drove the fastest milk cart in the West? No, you're a Fulham man, Fulham Dave - down to earth, sorted, knows what's right.
Ernie just do what your son wants that's what dads do. 049:gif
