Fulham players descriptions

[farfouille]

I am probably not the best to do this but I thought it would be funny to give descriptions to our players:

Mark Schwarzer - The old but bold stopper
David Stockdale - A potential Schwarzer
Neil Etheridge - Another potential Schwarzer
Csaba Somogyi - The goalie with the difficult name
Philippe Senderos - The left out defender
Brede Hangeland - Captain with uncertain future
Chris Baird - Bairdinho, the lightning that strikes twice
Aaron Hughes - The second H
John Arne Riise - The bullet shooting full-back
Matthew Briggs - The narcissistic bright prospect
Stephen Kelly - The versatile full-back
Sascha Riether - The king on the right flank
Mahamadou Diarra - The rock in midfield
Mickaël Tavares - The taken from the streets
Steve Sidwell - The g-i-n-g-e-r Iniesta
Georgios Karagounis - The Ancient Greek (borrowed that from a post in the forum)
Damien Duff - The supernatural legend with 4% body fat
Kieran Richardson - The pacey winger with awful short passing
Simon Davies - The Fulham veteran
Alexander Kačaniklić - A rising star on the left wing
Pajtim Kasami - An exciting talent with no place at Fulham
Kerim Frei - The ticking bomb for Fulham
Ashkan Dejagah - The explosive surprise on the right wing
Bryan Ruiz - A technician with a point to prove
Dimitar Berbatov - The silky touch magician
Mladen Petric - The striker who scores
Hugo Rodallega - The striker who can't score
Marcello Trotta - The 5th forward

Any better suggestions?

[os5889]

Berbatov - Per Gary Lineker - A gargantuan Bulgarian horse of a man

[Burt]

Senderos - The Marmite Man.

[farfouille]

Berbatov - Per Gary Lineker - A gargantuan Bulgarian horse of a man

Yes, I said pretty much the same. :)

[MOR :]

Where I sit in the "Johnny Haynes Stand"...these names are used...

Philippe Senderos - Time Bomb
John Arne Riise - Mummy's Boy
Sascha Riether - Herman the German
Georgios Karagounis - Bandy Bubble
Damien Duff - PlumDuff
Alexander Kačaniklić - KaKa
Ashkan Dejagah - Ash Can
Bryan Ruiz - Future Fulham legend
Dimitar Berbatov - Classy but Moody
Hugo Rodallega - Rodallega Bomb

[CanadianCottager]

Bryan Ruiz has his fair share of ridiculous nicknames, every know and then you'll hear the Spanish language commentators use them for him on TV, from what I can tell, he's el duende (the elf), la escoba (the broom), and la comadreja (the weasel).
Also, as for silly descriptions of Mahamadou Diarra, I nominate Ray Hudson football "commentator" extraordinaire's take on him back in 07
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=499TYSKaxKY

[CH FFC]

I love the Kieran Richarson one!
it is so true, how many times has he barely touched the ball, and leave it short...like it is an egg that will break.  I think it is contagious, after seeing him do it twice last game I saw two others (diarra, and Baird) do it too.