Is This Message Board Being Swamped By Agents And Their Friend?

[Berserker]

I am and always have been the agent for Bobby Zamora. Sadly we are both rubbish at our jobs.

Lighthouse, old buddy, old mate, me old china, etc, etc, I'd like you to be my agent and get me a job that I am rubbish at but get paid £80,000 per week please. I'll even agree to your extortionate 20% fee. I'll even deliver it in person to your park bench.

Pretty please.

No I want Lighthouse to be my agent, I'll throw in my gardening skills to keep his park nice as well as the 20%

[Lighthouse]

Findus FC have offered Mr Rupert a contract. I have taken my 20%. The Mascapone seemed the get away from me though.

Ms Berserker has a medical this morning at Soylent Green FC. All goes well we should all be eating well tonight.

Thanks for your confidence in me. Good to be back in the saddle.

[A Humble Man]

I am glad I do not represent the Horse Meat Federation.

[CincyFulham1]

I can have Freddy Adu on a plane to London in 10 mins.

[The Equalizer]

I am not a football agent, but I do represent Steve Guttenburg's talent, which is currently residing with a Swiss couple a few miles outside of Basel.

It can be yours for only £10,000.

[NogoodBoyo]

Whenever I'm feeling down, I like to tap up with a fine bit of foffing.
Nogood "foffing yerself again, isit" Boyo

[ToodlesMcToot]

I represent Banana Joe, current Westminster Dog Show title holder. Having accomplished all that he can in the canine world, he's looking to get into human sport. He's not an imposing figure physically, but I think we can all agree that Messi has proved that doesn't matter. He has a low center of gravity and is tough to knock off the ball. He sees himself as a tenacious defender with the ability to get forward into the attack from the left back position which we believe is a need for your club. He's bound to sell tons of jerseys for your club as he has a certain je ne sais quoi that transcends sport......and dog shows. Sort of Beckham'esque in that respect.

A photo for the unfortunate few who've not had an opportunity experience his dashing good looks.


As you can see he has an excelent vertical leaping ability.


With his additional two legs, we feel his ability to go 90 minutes week in and week out without the loss of energy will far exceed that of his human competitors.


As commemorated here, he's definitely tough in the tackle and willing to get stuck in.

[cmg]

I represent Banana Joe, current Westminster Dog Show title holder. Having accomplished all that he can in the canine world, he's looking to get into human sport. He's not an imposing figure physically, but I think we can all agree that Messi has proved that doesn't matter. He has a low center of gravity and is tough to knock off the ball. He sees himself as a tenacious defender with the ability to get forward into the attack from the left back position which we believe is a need for your club. He's bound to sell tons of jerseys for your club as he has a certain je ne sais quoi that transcends sport......and dog shows. Sort of Beckham'esque in that respect.

A photo for the unfortunate few who've not had an opportunity experience his dashing good looks.

5 Bundesligas, 2 LaLiga, European Cup, European Championship, World Cup

Seems like the right sort of look to me:

[HatterDon]

Should I be worried that I'm in the wrong forum?

You should always be worried. Full stop.

If I lived in France, I'd be perpetually terrified.

[Rupert]

Findus FC have offered Mr Rupert a contract. I have taken my 20%. The Mascapone seemed the get away from me though.

Ms Berserker has a medical this morning at Soylent Green FC. All goes well we should all be eating well tonight.

Thanks for your confidence in me. Good to be back in the saddle.

I regret to say we could not agree personal terms. There is only so much fish a man can eat before his brain starts to develop, and I can't be having anything to do with that sort of thing, thanks.

PS Lighthouse, they want their money back.

[Berserker]

Findus FC have offered Mr Rupert a contract. I have taken my 20%. The Mascapone seemed the get away from me though.

Ms Berserker has a medical this morning at Soylent Green FC. All goes well we should all be eating well tonight.

Thanks for your confidence in me. Good to be back in the saddle.

I regret to say we could not agree personal terms. There is only so much fish a man can eat before his brain starts to develop, and I can't be having anything to do with that sort of thing, thanks.

PS Lighthouse, they want their money back.

Failed my medical as well, Soylent Green said i was too gristly to be any good

[cebu]

Well, if you're an agent you have to be a bit secretive - mum's the word!

By the way, my name is Word ... James Word.

[Rupert]

Well, if you're an agent you have to be a bit secretive - mum's the word!

Just leve my Mum out of it, okay? She's just become a great grandmother and has enough to do right now.

Which reminds me, I get to call my sister "granny" next time I see her. If I suddenly stop posting, you'll all know why...

[FFCAli]

Failed my medical as well, Soylent Green said i was too gristly to be any good
[/quote]
Sorry to hear that......but I had my doubts!

[Terry Angus]

couldn't the title of this thread have been prefixed "NFR:" or, even better, "BS:"?

[SuffolkWhite]

I'm not an Agent, and I'm not a secret Agent or a Spy..............in fact I'm a Shepherd.........and if anyone asks if I'm a Shepherd's Spy........well... :dead horse:..... fp.gif

[Lighthouse]

As I sit on my park bench ready to face another night poor and alone. I would just like to point out Its not always the agents fault. Sometimes we are saddled with poor specimens who can't even climb to the bottom rung of the food chain ladder.

Right Ms B or Mr R can either of you sing?

[Berserker]

As I sit on my park bench ready to face another night poor and alone. I would just like to point out Its not always the agents fault. Sometimes we are saddled with poor specimens who can't even climb to the bottom rung of the food chain ladder.

Right Ms B or Mr R can either of you sing?

Actually yes i can sing, also used to get paid for it when i was younger

[Rupert]

As I sit on my park bench ready to face another night poor and alone. I would just like to point out Its not always the agents fault. Sometimes we are saddled with poor specimens who can't even climb to the bottom rung of the food chain ladder.

Right Ms B or Mr R can either of you sing?

Actually yes i can sing, also used to get paid for it when i was younger

I usually get paid not to sing, if that's any help.

[A Humble Man]

Only the British understand British humour and they don't understand it either really but laugh anyway.