FoF English Dictionary...

[WhiteJC]

one for HatterDon

Nostrum - Misplayed guitar chord


================================================

Notary - Definitely not Harry
Notable - A complete lack of desks
Hooray - The output from a sonic screwdriver
Hormones - Noises from a bordello
Website - Arachnoid targetting device
Woodpecker - Might consider giving her a small kiss
Femoral - The art of ***********
Florist - An expert on floors
Paintings - Jamaican torture implements
Papist - Dad's drunk

[Holders]

Obstacle - a German fruit that's in the way
Gemuse - a German speculating about vegetables

[ron]

Obstacle - a German fruit that's in the way
Gemuse - a German speculating about vegetables

Schmuck - A disreputable German jeweller

[The Bronsons]

Nantwich - Harry's Gran

[WhiteJC]

Goblet - A very small mouth
Grapple - A cross between a grape and an apple
Grappling - A young grape
Godspeed - It's raining
Semantics - Very small blood sucking creatures particularly fond of sailors
Sexual - Proposition from a Louisiana prostitute
Summer - Someone who is good at arithmetic
Capitulate - The mistake BP made in the Gulf of Mexico
Circle - The coolest knight around

[Matt Inglis]

Countryside - killing Piers Morgan

Brilliant.

[Holders]

Matt Inglis - not shiny, enveloped by dormouse

Continuing the vegetable theme:

carrot - rust
artichoke - painter's cough
cauliflower - a bouquet for a sheepdog
broccoli - a dog that rounds up badgers
broccoli - a badger's intestinal infection
purple-sprouting broccoli - probably untreatable in a badger, better shoot him
      before a cow catches it.
parsnip - father's tipple
turnip - to rotate one's tipple
asparagus - to try to be like Mr. Uhlenbeek

[Sheepskin Junior]

Exfoliate - Dalek soap

[WhiteJC]

following on from the recent post on the "language" used on the offal, here's a few words we should look out for...

Macaroon - To leave a Scotsman on a desert island
Magenta - Here comes the Queen
Mishmash - What Sean Connery will do if he doesn't get to church on Sunday
Module - Christmas with The Who
Nose dive - Bad plastic surgery clinic
Ovaltine - A fat adolescent
Pantomime - Underwear for the hard of hearing
Passport - Fathers' race
Pastiche - What Sean Connery eats in Cornwall
Phlegmatic - Battery-powered handkerchief
Pomegranate - Australian for a Englishman made of stone
Pretext - Letters and phone calls
Psychedelia - Mental cook
Quick - Noise made by a dyslexic duck
Receipt - To sit down again
Realist - A catalogue of bottoms
Reindeer - A Michael Winner weather prediction
Scruple - Cross between a screw top and a ring pull
Tabby - A big church in Yorkshire
Template - The secretary hasn't turned up
Tenure - How they describe a decade in the West Country
ball - A boat maker's first attempt at a coracle
Toll - Where you try to put the ball in on a Yorkshire golf course
Transport - Cross-dressing athletes
Truculent - That lorry you used to rent out
Unfettered - Without Greek cheese
Urinate - You're a size eight
Vanish - Rather like a van
Walnut - An obsessive bricklayer
Warehouse - A person who turns into a house at the Full Moon
Wince - A setting on Jonathan Ross's washing machine
X-ray - Former fish
Yodelling - Trainee Jedi knight
Zucchini - Animal park enthusiast

[Southcoastffc]

A couple of football definitions I've just made up.

Manager - woman
Physio - very sparkling water

[filham]

Kaleidoscope - new traffic camera which only captures accidents
Logarithm - to record a piece of music

Logarithm - Folk music of the North American lumberjack.

[filham]

A sailor throws a bucket of slops overboard from the top deck of a passenger liner shouting the warning "look out down below", seconds later an angry voice from below responds "You stupid English why you say look out when you mean look in".

[Holders]

Immaculate contraption - the popemobile after a wash.

[colinwhite]

Bungalow . something none of todays agents would accept

[colinwhite]

Piazon .conveniant place to stop in Spain  when caught short

[colinwhite]

Jokanovic  Tinned egg to rub on your chest

[colinwhite]

Les barratt  fewer pub rodents

[Southcoastffc]

Kalas - female motor mechanic

[Barrett487]

Malbranque = sick horse

Brevett = frog's brother

Hoogland = where hoogs live

Nevland = where Gary and Phil live

[Holders]

Cutbush - Brazilian
Fraser - what you use for the above